1. 約會前一小時:把握時間做仰臥起坐,讓自己看起來有腹肌 vs 睡午覺
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.32.37 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.32.37-PM-1024x631.jpg)
2. 約會前30分鐘:洗澡、吹頭髮、做造型 vs 醒來、拿擺在床邊的衛生紙擤鼻涕
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.32.54 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.32.54-PM-1024x510.jpg)
3. 約會前5分鐘:穿上妳的性感內衣 vs 穿上妳跟媽媽一起買的舒適膚色內衣
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.32.59 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.32.59-PM-1024x496.jpg)
4. 在酒吧:點啤酒,證明妳是個好相處的人 vs 點伏特加配汽水,因為啤酒很難喝、妳不想喝下1000卡路里,而且如果妳喝太醉說蠢話,你們明天可以一起拿來說笑
![Screen Shot 2016-03-02 at 6.38.05 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/Screen-Shot-2016-03-02-at-6.38.05-PM-1024x518.jpg)
5. 第一杯飲料:告訴他一個有趣的故事 vs 告訴他你已經講過五次的故事
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.33.09 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.33.09-PM-1024x515.jpg)
6.「哦那道疤痕?那是我在非洲當交換學生時留下來的」vs「哦那道疤痕?有次醫生試圖冷凍我長的疣,結果沒什麼用,還讓它變超大,所以他們得將我手上一大塊肉切下來,很噁吧?」
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.33.17 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.33.17-PM-1024x486.jpg)
7. 當他去上廁所:迅速檢查電郵,然後傳簡訊給妳的朋友報告情況 vs 看推特 (就算他回到桌子還是繼續讀那些貼文)
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.33.23 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.33.23-PM-1024x489.jpg)
8. 回到妳家:先跑進去把那盒餅乾塞進垃圾堆、藏好妳防止尿道感染的蔓越莓錠/妳用來擤鼻涕的衛生紙、趕快大便 vs 在他面前換棉條
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.33.28 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.33.28-PM-1024x489.jpg)
9. 在沙發上:展開激烈的調情,然後開始舌吻 vs 從嘴巴發出奇怪聲音進行交談
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.33.33 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.33.33-PM-1024x503.jpg)
10. 愛愛:模仿妳心目中有吸引力的人高潮的時候應該要有的模樣 vs 真正享受過程
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.33.39 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.33.39-PM-1024x501.jpg)
11. 當他隔天離開:盯著他的臉書照片猛瞧…因為他在你房間時,你怕一直盯著他會太明顯又奇怪,所以只能現在看個夠 vs 繼續睡
![Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 5.33.45 PM](http://www.teepr.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Screen-Shot-2016-02-26-at-5.33.45-PM-1024x502.jpg)
(往下還有更多精彩文章!)